I’m trying to forget it, but I can’t get Terry Gross’s interview (broadcast yesterday, but heard by me today) with celebrated Republican pollster Frank Luntz out of my head.

I was particularly struck by an early segment in which Luntz, whose new book is entitled Words that Work, suggests that everyone read George Orwell’s famous essay on “the English language.” He then goes on to explain that, since the essay celebrates precise language, it’s actually a very good thing to be Orwellian.

Of course, the word “Orwellian” in common usage doesn’t refer to the essay, actually called “Politics and the English Language,” but to 1984, in which the dictator Big Brother asserts that war is peace and that freedom is slavery. Yes, Luntz gets Orwellian about Orwell and the word “Orwellian.” I don’t think it’s possible to get any more Orwellian than that.

I found this astonishing act of rhetorical chutzpah a little strange, until I did some research and found this Daily Show appearance, which also explained why Luntz didn’t sound too happy when Terry Gross treated him to an unrelated Jon Stewart clip at another point in the interview.

But that’s only the beginning of the double, triple, and quadruplespeak. In later portions of the interview, you can hear Luntz:

– Defend the term “death tax” because, well, first someone dies and then someone pays a tax (but forget that, in  the interim, someone has received at least a couple of million dollars in an arcane process once called “inheritance”);

– Argue that the Sierra Club’s leadership is “extreme” because of acts of civil disobedience taken by radical environmental groups with which it is not associated. (So, I guess it would be okay for me to argue that the GOP is murderously racist because the KKK has lynched people.)

– Emphatically deny that the word “gaming” in describing what happens in casinos is an industry euphemism. You see, tourists in Las Vegas often spend more time and money on restaurants, shopping, and hanging out at the spa than they do at the tables or slot machines, doing that thing where you risk your money and sometimes you win but you mostly lose….but which the word “gambling” doesn’t fully describe because of the eating and the spaing and the shopping. And…and…and…those kids, with their video games, they call it “gaming.” (Here Luntz engages in a classic strategy where you defend your point by completely contradicting it.)

– Emphasize that conservatives are oppressed by a “double standard.” Luntz was, Lord help him, criticized for making a caustic jab about Nancy Pelosi and plastic surgery. Obviously, no media liberal has ever suffered for any off the cuff remark, give or take a few million Dixie Chicks CDs, Bill Maher’s job at ABC, and Howard Dean’s entire 2004 campaign. (Remember when Howard came up with the shocker that capturing Saddam didn’t make us any safer? Boy, was he ever out of touch with the mainstream.)

– Plead with NPR-listening liberals that they shouldn’t hold a grudge him because he sometimes plays golf or something with unnamed Democratic presidential candidates. (The stupid ones, I’m guessing.)

– And inveigh against that those mean, mean bloggers who are really vicious and angry because they say nasty things about him when he makes hilarious jokes about Nancy Pelosi’s possible facelift. He feels very sorry for us. (I was actually feeling fairly placid before I listened the interview. Afterwards, I was ready to sacrifice a small rodent on the altar of my rage.)

Now, I recommend that you listen to the interview yourself. I know for some of you what I’m doing is kind of the equivalent of saying “hey, this stuff smells really bad, wanna smell it?”, but the interview actually is very much worth your time. Frank Luntz may be a jerk, but he’s no fool and he’s been partially responsible for lots of electoral victories though, thank God, not too recently. Consider listening.

Finally, Lutz’s recommendation of the Orwell essay may be gonorrhea recommending penicillin, but it’s a crucial read for everyone who writes or in any way cares about our language and its misuse. If you’ve missed it up to now, don’t dare to write another word until you’ve read it — or reread it.

I found (and read) an only slightly user unfriendly version here.